Today I came across the idea of designing my mind. I recently came across the idea that if we are able to design, prototype, revise and design , cars, phones, logo’s building designs etc. Why not be able to do this for our own minds? I notice that within my own there are currently some defects with the current design of my mind. However like any good designer. Prototypes are meant to be fixed and improved.
What are some of the things I’m doing to design my mind?
Some things I’m doing right now to design my mind is im starting to write down all my goals that I want to achieve. Instead of just having them float around in my head. I wrote them down so I could physically see them and subconsciously work towards them . I’ve also started to browse into my past to see how I’ve adopted some disempowering models of reality into my mind ( Set points and models of reality Jan 6, 2018) . I’ve noticed that as I try to access my older memories of traumatic experiences to see how they have shaped me today; A lot of them are unclear to me. This may be because having conscious access to them may be painful for me to remember so my subconscious represses them in order to protect me. So I’m experimenting with a exercise that will help me remember them. What i’m doing is writing on a piece of paper what parts of my childhood are missing and what I want to know about them. This will give me a goal to work towards during my meditations and a direction for my subconscious to work towards as it sorts through the memory archive.
When it comes to accessing old memories they may be affected in various ways. If a memory was created during childhood or adolescence the brain is not fully developed during memory creation. In turn the memory will not be as clear as one developed during adulthood. An example of this may be a kids drawing when he is 5 years old compared to when he is 25 . The child’s drawing will be much more raw and undeveloped.
One key thing I’ve come to realize when it comes to designing your mind is that , you need to accept yourself for who you are. you need to love yourself for all your faults and flaws. Self Love is so key. Once I was able to accept who I am only then was I able to begin to start improving. It was hard, especially to accept the worst parts of myself. I like to imagine people not as singular beings but a collection of multiple personas and mindsets they have adopted as they age. I definitely see it in myself. I have never lost the parts of me who I was in the past. I’ve just chosen to keep the good parts of my past selves and left behind the negative.
Ego and Self
One of the hardest parts of doing this is when a negative aspect of yourself has shaped so much of who you are . It in a sense becomes a part of “you”. When it comes time to let that part of you go, it feels like death. It feels like a part of you is dying. It hurts because I attached so much of my identity with that part of myself. This experience is what a lot of people call “Ego death”. It is a painful yet transformative experience. It is the key to personal growth. However what I’ve noticed though is that after every ego death. a new one begins to grow in its place. Always. and it starts to build up again . much like plaque on your teeth. If it is not cleaned and maintained daily it will eventually get so bad that you need other tools to remove it. The ego is much like this . It consistently and persistently grows. However with practice ( Meditation) you can be mindful of the growth of the ego and you can cleanse it every single day. In my opinion a very small ego death every day is much better than a huge big one after a long period. I notice though that after the ego death. you get such clarity. Clarity into who you really are , truly, on the deeper level . With the smaller ego deaths I get small little bits of clarity into myself every day. In doing so I grow everyday. With larger extended periods of ego growth . You’ll go for long periods of “blindness” so to speak. You’ll drift farther and farther away from who you really are until, It cracks. The ego cracks and you gain a large amount of insight into yourself and can return to your “self”.
That’s it for today
Stay Blessed , Stay Humble